If you’re thinking about your professional new year’s resolutions, professional development should be top of mind. [Read more…] about How to invest in your career for 2014
How to find a job when all you can see is fog
Last week, I traveled to Chicago to speak at the CFA Institute’s annual conference. Traveling into the city from the airport, I knew I should be able to see the skyline…Maybe I am biased (having grown up in the area), but I think Chicago has one of the most lovely skylines of any city. [Read more…] about How to find a job when all you can see is fog
Use emotional intelligence to overcome job search hurdles during holidays
I hope you have been following the recent blogging series with great advice from my colleagues in various sectors of the “careers” industry. (See the links at the end of this post.) Today, I have a contribution from Lisa Caldas Kappesser, author of The Smart New Way to Get Hired: Use Emotional Intelligence and Land the Right Job.
I think emotional intelligence is one of the most overlooked factors in job seeking and have written about “soft skills” several times. (Follow THIS LINK to learn more about soft skills/emotional intelligence.)
Lisa’s thoughts on the question of job searching during the holidays:
The holidays are a joyous time for many people, but for those who are out of work and looking for a job, it may not feel like such a joyous time.
Losing a job is one of the top five most stressful life events and it is filled with many emotions such as sadness, anger, frustration and worry. Losing a job impacts family budgets and plans, and everyone in the family is affected by such an event.
Being out of a job over the holidays adds to this stress. Buying presents and food for meals and parties can be very draining on budgets. Parents and children also have to cope with the reality of how it will affect their holiday spending and plans. An airplane trip to visit grandma may be out of the picture this year.
So how do you get through this tough time and stay productive in your job search?
Well it begins with awareness of your emotions and managing them effectively.
Emotional intelligence is “the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and others” (Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence, 1995). It entails four skill areas: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and social skills that, when used together effectively, can bring about your desired impact or outcome.
The good news is that everyone has these skills to some degree but they can be further developed to increase one’s effectiveness in reaching goals. I see emotional intelligence as a tool that one can use to be more successful in their job search.
Being aware of your feelings is the first step. Reflect on the bodily signs and label what you are feeling, for example, angry or worried. Vent your feelings in healthy ways through talking, writing or exercising. These feelings are natural and normal. Next, reflect on your thoughts. Thoughts drive emotions. Are you thinking negative or pessimistic thoughts? If so, this can lead to can lead to unproductive behavior.
Being emotionally intelligent is about challenging and changing your negative thoughts and making them realistic and positive. This will in turn drive positive behaviors and create energy.  If you are constantly worrying about getting a job because you are telling yourself there are not enough jobs to go around, or you don’t have the education needed to get a job, you will feel increasingly worried, hopeless and sad. Feeling this way can lead you to procrastinate, sleep more or avoid job search tasks which work against your ultimate goal of finding a job. The reality is that it is a difficult time. However, there are jobs available.
Turnover is a part of life. The reality is that the job market is very competitive. You should do all that you can to stay in the running for that position that you are interested in. If you feel education is a factor, start taking a class or certification course.
Keep a sense of humor. Remember to keep things in perspective. Embrace changes by expecting them and use your energy to problem solve and adapt rather than to fight or complain. When faced with difficult situation, ask yourself three questions:
1. What do I have control over?
2. What don’t I have control over?
3. What can I do?
The answer always comes back to the fact that you have control over yourself and how you adapt and deal with the situation. You have no control over others or the economy. You can influence others and organizations but you can not control or change them. So use your energy and manage yourself. Influence what you can and you will feel better and in turn have more energy and motivation.
Communicate with your families regarding the situation as well as the plan. Remember, everyone may experience the situation a little differently. Try to see things from others’ perspectives and be respectful and caring. This will go a long way. Working together as a team through the changes and tough times can bring families closer together.
Lisa Kappesser is president of EQ Coaching Solutions. She develops and facilitates emotional intelligence programs for organizations to improve teamwork and enhance leadership.
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Be sure to take a look at all the great advice from my colleagues:
Part 1 – My suggestions and a free ebook offer
Part 2 – Walter Akana – Take care of yourself
Part 3 – Anita Bruzzese – Stay ahead of the crowd
Part 4 – Jacqui Barrett-Poindexter – Unplug and embrace rest
Part 5 – Wendy Enelow – Ideas for employed and unemployed job seekers
Part 6 – GL Hoffman – Use time to research and prepare
Part 7 – Meghan M. Biro – Use the holidays as a time for self assessment
Part 8 – Craig Fisher – Recruiters don’t ease up during the holidays – neither should you
Part 9 – Ronnie Ann – Take advantage of other peoples’ resolutions
Part 11 – Sharlyn Lauby – Take your job search social
Part 12 – Karla Porter – Be in it to win it
I can help with every part of your job hunt! Need a great resume? Tips to use social networking? Interview coaching? If you need help mobilizing your networks and your job search plans, learn more about how I can help you! While you’re at it, don’t forget those social networks! Be sure to become a fan of Keppie Careers on Facebook…I’d be thrilled to have you as part of the community! Since we’re on the subject of doing something new…Are you on Twitter? Jump on and touch base with me @keppie_careers.
photo by donsolo
Review of Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High
If you asked me, “What is the single most important skill a job seeking candidate can have?,” I would initially probably respond along the lines of, “It depends on the job!” However, upon further thought, I might also reply, “Being a strong communicator is an underlying key skill for any job seeker.”
I’ve written about the importance of “soft skills” or “emotional intelligence.” Some business schools are incorporating classes to teach communication and leadership skills, as they are so important in the workplace. Let’s face it – if you have trouble communicating, you are likely to have trouble getting along with colleagues, persuading others to agree with you and succeeding in most workplaces.
So, when I received a review copy of Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan and Al Switzler, I was intrigued. Yes – we all have and (should) expect to encounter opportunities for “crucial” conversations. For some, those conversations will occur in an elevator in a chance encounter with an influential person. For others, it is a critical moment in their careers – a presentation, an interaction – that has the capacity to propel or stall progress.
As the authors note – “stakes are high.” They also assert what they call their “audacious claim:” Master your crucial conversations and you’ll kick-start your career, strengthen your relationships and improve your health. As you and others master high-stakes discussions, you’ll also vitalize your organization and your community” (p. 9). Wow…Certainly a tall order!
Are you ready for a crucial conversation? Can you easily communicate in a way that sells your idea? If not, the authors assure us that dialogue skills are “moderately easy to learn.”
The book continues with anecdotes and stories to describe ways to think about communication. Readers are encouraged to first look within – to understand their own motivations and biases and to examine their own styles in various circumstances. I love the fact that self-assessment is a key aspect of this book, as I believe it is an often overlooked piece of the pie.
Via dialogues, examples and mini personal assessments, the authors show you how to express your needs and wants in ways that attract agreement. I’d recommend this book to anyone who needs to communicate well…And, well – I guess that is just about anyone!
It takes more than being a great communicator to propel your job search (although it helps). Find out how I can help you get moving in the right direction.
Job seekers-what message are you sending?
I was driving to the YOU NEED A JOB presentation I’m doing with Stephanie A. Lloyd, and I saw a man on the side of the road holding a very large sign. It read, “PUBLIC SALE.”
My first thought was, “Hmmm…wonder what that means.” Then, all I could think about was that it was so sad for this man to be out in the heat, holding up a sign that did not offer any clue whatsoever as to the nature of the sale or what was being sold. I don’t know many people who would pull off the road to investigate an ambiguous sale. What a waste of time and effort!
Since I look for job search lessons and inspiration in everything, it occurs to me that many job seekers are actually doing the equivalent of holding up a “PUBLIC SALE” sign.
Think about it – is your resume clearly targeted to appeal to the employers you want to address? Or, is your resume all about you, without a thought given to what will interest the employer? Are you using lingo and jargon that your targeted employer won’t understand? Including details that are irrelevant to the job of interest?
When you meet someone, can you clearly state what you have to offer and, if appropriate, what you want to do? Or, are you going around saying that you can “do anything” are “open to anything,” “flexible,” “can learn whatever it is.”
You get the point – if you are not specific and clear, you are the job seeking equivalent of the man holding up the “PUBLIC SALE” sign. You are wasting your time and unlikely to move forward with your search.
Take a good, long look at your materials. Think about what you say when you meet people. Spend some time evaluating what you are doing. Is it clear what you offer? If not, it’s time to make a change.
Need a great resume and a focused approach to your search? I can help! Learn more about what I offer to help you with your job search.